Nobody wants me. I’m not worthy.
That’s how rejection feels. Those are the words we tell ourselves when things don’t go to plan.
Rejection starts early in life; in the playground when no one wants to play with you, when you’re not invited to the cool person’s party, when your first love dumps you, when you don’t get the right grades, or the dream job, or when you get to thirty and life doesn’t look like you thought it would.
Rejection is failure, and we are taught from an early age to chase success and avoid failure at all costs. Stick to the certainties. Hedge your bets. Don’t take risks. Be thankful for what you have. We all know that person with the unhappy marriage and the job they hate.
“Can’t grumble,” they say, when what they really mean is, “I can’t walk away from this because what if changing my life only makes it worse?”
As a writer and self-employed consultant, ‘no’ is the word I hear most often. Actually, no, that’s not true, because hearing the word ‘no’ is a good day. Most days, I hear nothing. That agonising Schrodinger’s wait, the silence where the absence of a yes or no means anything may still be possible – my big break could still happen. This new deal, this new book, this new client, this amazing opportunity still has the potential to be THE ONE. The moment that will change my life.
Until it’s not.
I’ve been lecturing and running workshops for creatives and students since 2017. At first, I was invited to schools to talk about writing and how I became a published fiction author. My background is in marketing (I’m one of those rare people who enjoys talking in front of a live audience), so my classes soon evolved, and I was invited to universities, writing academies, film schools, and businesses to talk about self-branding and marketing for creatives.
The more I taught, the more I realised the one theme that united everyone – from the disinterested fifteen-year-old at the back of the class to the eager fifty-year-old woman wanting to write the book she always dreamed of – was fear of rejection. So I started running workshops on rejection, resilience, and handling criticism.
And that’s when everything changed.
In 2025, I launched Loom Narrative, a storytelling consultancy specialising in guiding business leaders navigating change or increased uncertainty. The Rejection Rewrite Frameworkâ˘, draws directly on how stories function in literature, film, and brand-building, translating those principles into tools leaders can actually use when making decisions in both their careers and personal lives.
In simpler terms, I show people in business how to make their failures lead to success. Because wouldn’t it be really hilarious if the one thing we all try to avoid may actually be the catalyst that gets us closer to our goals?
This is my first Loom Narrative article, but it won’t be my last. I will be sharing lots of stories about rejection and resilience, and how you can rewrite any situation and make it work for you. Some will be personal stories. Some may even have happy endings!
The other day I was talking to a friend, who also happens to be a very successful businesswoman, and she called me ‘brave’ for starting a new business from scratch. It wasn’t a strange observation for her to make. After all, I’ve been living abroad for the last fifteen years and only returned to London six months ago. Setting up my consultancy has not only meant starting a new job, but doing so while building a brand new life and establishing a network from the ground up.
“Why brave?” I asked her.
“Because this new business of yours may not work. It’s a huge risk. What if you fail?”
I laughed. “But I teach failure,” I replied. “I’m really good at it. I’ve spent my life getting rejected; I have it down to a fine art. Why would I be scared of it?”
I wouldn’t have thirteen books published if I’d stopped when no one wanted the first one. I wouldn’t be executive producer on the adaptation of one of my books if I didn’t think my delusional dreams were possible. I wouldn’t have lived in four countries if I thought there was a chance I’d miss home (shocker – some days I did). In fact, why do any of us do anything without the certainty of success at the end of it?
So I hope people say no to you today. I hope rejection is just around the corner. I hope you are criticized, judged, pushed away, turned down, and dismissed. Why? Because exciting things only happen to those who understand that success is at the end of a road paved with nos.
LoomNarrative.com